Lament

lo these many years
I entreat before thee
all their days and nights
one devoted to the other
yet denied thy pardon
I remain
arrested from the age
 
oblivion intern
a despondent nullity
compelling
presage of insanity
deemed a lesser of evil
 
hope dashed upon a pale
of promise,  I am
the very shard shattered
which severs the soul
 
once yesterday's
bloom
offered its buds
but in these days
a child
diffident, pruned
vitiable
immured within
 
sanctuary
as cell—cell as
sanctuary
 
love's fortuity rose
ne'er descrying its
occasion,
doubt surrendered
its fleeting atonement
 
withered, outcast
in the garden
who's only embrace
now the embittered root
entangling
strangling to leech
a destitute heart
abetting this arrest
 
I cry from the exile
of this alien heart
I beg thee
hold me no more
to thy relentless repudiation
 
this wound rend
with its oppressive rue
let now this embittered
laceration
release! 
blush my frail spirit
and revive this beaten heart
lest my fate
perish in penitence
for doubt
I ne'er atoned
 
mercy is my cry
for all I wanted
was to love
to give in its bliss
to open you my crimson one
and allow your
life blood to flow
in grace
with tender anointing
coalescing
in love's transfusion
 
instead carved asunder
with singular
incision
 
all my years
feign understanding
unknown
and unrealized
alas, the seer
ne'er the sought
all is mockery
so my portion
consigned
 
now—drain
the loss
 
this account
desolates
every vessel now weighted
to draw till I can spend
no more
 
too anemic to dream
naught to know
but the beggary
known all of my days
none that remain will sustain
 
to this poverty then
grant thy pardon

Written by Scott Schoffstall
© April 16, 2011
all rights reserved
http://www.poeticsojourn.com/the-sojourner.html